There are some days when the battle seems to be harder than others and the soldier just needs to rest. This past week has been that way. The side effects of the chemo, neulasta, and the lupron shot seem to be taking over. Extreme exhaustion, hot flashes and just not having energy is wearing on me.
Today I have the swollen throat side effect. It is just not a good week. I feel like my house is caving in around me and the mess is so overwhelming that I can't stand it. Yet I sit and look at it because it took all the energy I had just to cut up cheese and ham and get crackers for the kids for lunch. My entire body aches and every little task takes all I have. I am so ready to be done with this yet I have a long road to go. The hormones are driving me crazy. I cry at every little thing and I have no idea what I am even crying about. I keep waiting to feel normal again, but I am not sure when that will ever happen.
I know that God will get me through this. There are just some days that feel like this battle won't end. I know that I must be strong enough to handle this but this week I don't feel strong enough to handle much of anything.
Please pray for God's Grace and strength each day as I battle on.
I am praying for you!! It must be very difficult. Thank God He sustains us when we feel we can't walk another step in our own strength. Thinking of you...
ReplyDeleteIt's is totally ok to be feeling what you are feeling, Kerri. Don't get down on yourself for feeling what is natural at this time. You are so strong and courageous, and I admire you so much for all you are going thru. You are handling everything with such grace and positivity. Don't fault yourself for having a down spell. I really wish I lived close so i could come over and give you a hand. I will continue to pray for you and ask God to continue to hold you up and guide you through this. Love you girl!!
ReplyDeleteI'm praying, Keri!!
ReplyDeleteHang in there Kerri!! You WILL feel better again and I pray for it to be soon! One step at a time and don't worry about the mess there will be time to clean it up.
ReplyDeletePraying for you!
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Keri - I pray you will find strength and peace to handle this part of the journey. Its ok for things to get behind...sometimes the best you can do isn't what you want, but its still the best you can do. Here's something that has encouraged me - when all else fails - just do the next thing, don't look too far ahead or try to solve too many problems. God will take care of the details and what comes after each step, as long as we can take the one step. Sometimes all we can do is take that next small step and each time He'll give us another step to take.
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